Raising teens is a whole other ballgame in comparison to raising younger kids – especially when it comes to keeping them safe.
With toddlers and younger kids, we baby-proof the house and hold their hand in traffic and try to discourage them from jumping from the top bunk or breaking a bone on a trampoline.
With teens, keeping them safe and protected and happy looks different.
Suddenly, the possible dangers and problems become more murky, and less black and white, with phones and screen time being the issue most parents worry about when it comes to their tweens and teens.
When kids become teens, they have phones to communicate with their friends, organise themselves and also to keep in touch with you when they are out and about. However, that phone then often turn into a real nuisance when teens are at home, where they can end up spending hours staring into a screen, doom-scrolling their lives away.
Teens and screentime – this works best
It might feel tempting to just ban screentime completely, especially if this is something you find yourself battling with your teen about on the regular.
However, says US psychologist – and mum – Dr Lisa Damour, a ban might not be the way to go, and so instead, she urges parents to think about balance and limits.
Recently, Damour shared a tip on social media about how to regulate screen time for teens and the impact it can have on their mental health and your family. And we love this idea.
The psychologist said:
‘Parents often ask me, ‘if you could make just one rule when it comes to teens and technology, what would it be?’
And her reply is beautifully straight forward:
‘That’s simple: No tech in the bedroom.’
Damour goes on to explain how she is generally not a fan of allowing any technology – especially phones – in bedrooms. And, she warns parents, this especially goes for overnight, when phones should be kept downstairs or at least well away from your teens bedroom.
For starters, the psychologist explains, no phone in the bedroom means that your child will get a better night’s sleep.
‘We know there’s a huge link between quality sleep and quality mental health,’ she continued.
Phones belong only in public spaces at home
Her second reason, and this is a rule I enforce at home with my own teenagers too, if we only allow teens to use technology in the spaces that are public at home, might just help them keep in mind that whatever your put into a group or on social media can absolutely end up being public – whether they like it to be or not.
‘I think being able to use these devices behind closed doors can sometimes make that a murky point, when we want it to be crystal clear,’ Damour said.
There is also another reason the expert and author reckons kids should not be allowed to keep their phones in their rooms overnight.
‘Some of the most regrettable things I have seen teenagers do with their technology have been things that they do in the middle of the night, at like one in the morning, when their brakes are weak, their impulses are strong,’ Damour warns parents.
‘And so not having access to technology through the night is something that can help teenagers stay on the right track, and not do something they wish they hadn’t done.’
