A mum asked for advice after her 11-year-old daughter asked a question that all parents dread, especially parents of one child.
Death is a scary topic for anyone, especially children. They often can’t comprehend life without their parents, and even though we know that they will be fully grown adults when we pass on (hopefully), it’s still a difficult thing to explain.
One mum was caught off guard when her only child asked what she would do when her parents were dead, scared that she would be all alone. ‘When you and daddy die, I’m going to be all alone. I know I’ll have friends, but no one will get how alone I am,’ the tween said to her mum, who admitted she was ‘instantly gutted’.
She told her daughter that even people with siblings feel lonely sometimes and having siblings doesn’t guarantee that they will be there for you in times of hardship as an adult.
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The daughter said that while she knows she has cousins and friends, they will ‘never’ be as sad as she is.
‘I hid in the bathroom and cried when we got home,’ she said. ‘I’m afraid I dismissed her fear, her very legitimate fear. She’s so little, how is she already thinking about this?’
‘Nothing is guaranteed in life’
The ‘lost’ mum asked other Reddit users for their advice, and many had words of wisdom to share – namely that death is hard on people, no matter how many siblings or people to support them they have.
‘I’m an only child and chose to have just one child even before getting married. Right now she’s too young to see the value of chosen family. My BFF is also an only child and we honestly behave like sisters. She won’t be alone. She’ll also (probably) have her own family which will ensure she’s not alone. All of that is hard to see when you’re 11 but makes so much sense as you grow up,’ said one person.
‘If you had another kid, one of them would die before the other and then the remaining one would still eventually be “alone”,’ another added.
‘I had a brother who died at 25 and I will also be the lone holder of all my childhood memories when my parents are gone. Nothing is guaranteed in life, no matter how many kids are in your family.’
Someone else related to the daughter, writing: ‘I’m an only child and when I was little I remember I guilted my mom with things like that too. I was very attached to her. But now I have my husband and my own daughter. They make up a much bigger part of my world than my parents do at this point. When they die it will be very sad, but I won’t be alone.’
